Of course, these must be healthy drinking sessions, and both should not drink too much.
According to a recent study published in the journal The Gerontologist, couples who share similar drinking habits tend to be happier and live longer than couples who do not drink at all or where only one partner has a drinking habit.
The results were drawn after scientists from the University of Michigan, USA surveyed over 4,600 couples, monitoring their marital lives and health from 1996 to 2016.
“Interestingly, we found that couples who drank alcohol together in the last three months lived longer than couples who did not do this or couples with opposing drinking habits, where one drinks while the other does not,” said Dr. Kira Birditt, a psychology professor and the lead author of the study from the University of Michigan.
Couples who share similar drinking habits tend to be happier. (Illustrative image).
“Drinking partnership“: When your partner is also your drinking buddy
According to Professor Kira Birditt, the peculiar relationship she discovered from her research is related to a term called “Drinking partnership“, or “Partner-drinking buddy“.
This term was first coined in 1998 by two American scientists, Linda J. Roberts and Kenneth E. Leonard, in a study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family.
They found that the drinking habits of both individuals in a relationship (dating, cohabiting, or married) can significantly affect the quality and satisfaction of that relationship.
Couples with similar alcohol consumption levels tend to have better marital relationships compared to couples with differing drinking habits, especially when one drinks more than their partner, regardless of whether it is the husband or wife.
The study also indicates that incompatibility in drinking habits can lead to conflicts, discord, and decreased marital satisfaction. This may arise from one partner drinking more or less than the other, creating stress or a feeling of not sharing experiences and time together.
Roberts and Leonard emphasize that understanding the impact of drinking habits on relationships can help couples recognize and address issues before they become sources of larger conflicts, thereby improving the quality of their relationship.
The “Drinking partnership” or “Partner-drinking buddy” relationship has been studied since the last century.
The findings of Roberts and Leonard can be explained through “Compatibility theory“, which suggests that when two individuals share many commonalities at the same time, they tend to establish intimate relationships and both feel satisfied.
The research shows that the more compatible two people are, meaning they share more commonalities, the more satisfied they are with each other, showing higher commitment in the relationship, and particularly, their health and longevity increase.
In contrast, when couples are incompatible, meaning they have many differences, they tend to experience more conflicts and become increasingly at odds within the relationship.
“Generalizing from compatibility theory, if drinking alcohol regularly is a fundamental and enjoyable part of social interaction, then couples will have positive evaluations of these relationships.
Compared to couples with differing drinking habits, compatible couples are more likely to maintain their relationship longer and encounter fewer issues related to alcohol and dissatisfaction in the relationship.” A study published in the Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs in 2014 noted.
Compatible couples are more likely to maintain their relationship longer. (Illustrative image).
What does the new study find?
In her new study, Professor Kira Birditt and her colleagues from the University of Michigan surveyed 9,312 participants from 4,656 heterosexual couples who were either married or cohabiting without marriage.
They were asked questions such as:
- Do you ever drink any alcoholic beverages like wine or beer?
- On average, how many days a week do you drink them in the past three months?
- On days when you drink alcohol, how much do you drink?
The results showed that 62% of respondents consumed alcohol, while 38% did not. Among them, 45% of couples drank together, 29% had no drinkers, 17% had husbands who drank alone, and 8% had wives who drank alone.
To assess marital quality, several questions were used, such as:
- Does your partner frequently demand too much from you?
- Does he or she often scold you?
- Does he or she frequently disappoint you?
- Does he or she often make you anxious?
All these questions were weighted to calculate the level of marital satisfaction.
Meanwhile, the health of the study participants was measured from the Health and Retirement Study that these couples participated in from 1996 to 2016, with surveys conducted every two years for at least six consecutive years.
The compatible drinking group tends to live longer, as long as they consume at a moderate level.
The study found that couples who drank together in the last three months lived longer than those who did not or those with opposing drinking habits, where one drank while the other did not.
After processing the data, Professor Kira Birditt found no correlation between the frequency of alcohol consumption and the happiness of couples. Instead, she only saw that compatibility and incompatibility affected it.
“Compatibility“ means that when both partners drink alcohol, their marital quality increases over time. When both partners do not drink, their marital quality remains unchanged over time.
On the other hand, “incompatibility“ in drinking habits relates to two cases. When the husband drinks and the wife does not, their marital quality decreases. When the wife drinks and the husband does not, the marital quality of this couple decreases even more significantly.
The divorce rate among “incompatible” drinking couples is higher than that of compatible groups. Particularly, if the wife drinks and the husband does not, the divorce rate is even higher than that of couples where the husband drinks.
Regarding health, Professor Kira Birditt noted that the compatible drinking group tends to live longer, as long as they consume alcohol at a moderate level. Couples who consume alcohol moderately live longer than both heavy drinkers and those who do not drink at all.
The study shows that if both partners are present at a party and consume alcohol together, intimacy and happiness between them may increase.
What can we draw from this study?
Clearly, this is a counterintuitive result, as we see alcohol is often a cause of conflict, domestic violence, and the breakdown of couples. However, Professor Kira Birditt notes that it depends on the level, the circumstances under which alcohol is consumed, and who you are drinking with.
A study published in the Journal of Studies on Alcohol and Drugs in 2019 found that if in a relationship one partner goes out to drink and then comes home, they are more likely to create conflict.
However, if both partners are present at a party and consume alcohol together, their intimacy and happiness will increase. The level of happiness is even higher if it is a private home party just for the two of them.
At that point, moderate alcohol consumption is considered a shared activity that fosters effective communication between husband and wife.
The World Health Organization (WHO) allows a safe level of alcohol consumption not exceeding 2 units of alcohol per day for men and 1 unit per day for women.
In this case, 1 unit of alcohol = Volume (ml) x (concentration %) x density (alcohol has a density of 0.793g/cm3). Thus, 1 unit of alcohol = 10g of pure alcohol.
For alcoholic beverages with an alcohol content of 40 degrees, one unit of alcohol is equivalent to just 1 shot of 30 ml. For wine with an alcohol content of 13.5 degrees, this equates to approximately 1 glass of 100 ml. Meanwhile, for beer with an alcohol content of 5 degrees, one unit corresponds to 1 can or a draft beer mug.
Therefore, at an intimate gathering with alcoholic drinks, a husband may consume 2 cans of beer or 2 glasses of wine, while his wife can drink half that amount.
In summary, occasionally consuming alcohol together can ignite the flame of your marriage, potentially enhancing your longevity. As long as you drink within permissible limits, alcohol should not negatively impact your health or your relationship.
