Studies on Gift Giving Reveal the Truth About Recipients That Will Help You Choose the Perfect Gift for Any Occasion!
Originating in England in the mid-19th century, Boxing Day (26th December) is considered one of the most important holidays following Christmas.
This day is also celebrated in countries that were once British colonies, such as Australia, Hong Kong, Canada, and several others. It serves as a day for families and friends to gather, enjoy meals together, share feelings, and exchange meaningful gifts.
On Boxing Day, gifts are meant to express the giver’s feelings and also serve as a way to convey wishes during this special occasion.
However, recent studies by scientists have highlighted some psychological aspects of gift-giving that reveal potential “risks” for both parties involved. Let’s explore these findings to gain insights into the art of gift-giving and the psychology of gift recipients.
1. In Reality, We Often Dislike Surprising Gifts
The safest way to give a gift that the recipient will appreciate is to… ask them directly. However, this method can be quite dull, as it loses its essence and feels more like “buying for someone else.”
Thus, most people find themselves pondering the most suitable gift during this time – something beautiful, meaningful, budget-friendly, and importantly, “surprising.” However, various studies have shown that people may not actually enjoy “surprises.”
Professors from Harvard and Stanford universities discovered through several experiments that gift recipients often prefer exactly what they requested, with some even preferring “to be asked.” Moreover, those who give gifts that the recipient likes are praised as being “thoughtful and deep,” while gifts that took a long time to find are often undervalued.
Despite knowing this, we cannot escape this tendency. Researchers indicate that people have a propensity to use themselves as a benchmark and assume that others will also appreciate what they like. In other words, we always hope that the gifts we give will be well-received, yet we also feel dissatisfied when receiving gifts that do not please us.
Interestingly, among the gifts that people value the most, the one that is given the least is “money.”
2. We Dislike Receiving Gifts Accompanied by Many “Add-Ons”
We often think that giving gifts “the more, the better” will make recipients value them more. Logically, this makes sense since human satisfaction is limitless. However, humans often act contrary to this logic, at least in the realm of… receiving gifts.
When presented with gifts that come with various “add-ons,” recipients tend to focus on the smaller items and evaluate the overall worth of the gift based on those, even if the main gift is valuable.
For instance, a recipient may prefer a sweater over a sweater that comes with candies and snacks. This is because they might think, “the sweater’s value must be too low, hence the need for additional items to enhance its worth.”
According to researchers, this phenomenon is similar to penalties in Western countries: fines accompanied by a certain number of community service hours. If only fined, the offender may feel burdened, but if community service is included, they might even accept it happily, perceiving the punishment as much lighter.
3. Some People Dislike Receiving Gifts
Generally, everyone enjoys receiving gifts, except for a few “odd ones.” However, in reality, many people do not wish to receive gifts, and a significant portion of them are “men.”
We often assume that men are very easygoing. They appear to accept any gift without much thought, sometimes leaving the giver feeling hurt.
However, recent studies indicate that many men struggle with expressing emotions, specifically gratitude when receiving gifts. Women tend to thank the giver and view the gift as a gesture of goodwill.
Men, on the other hand, may find themselves racking their brains to think of an equivalent gift to give back, especially when they receive expensive gifts. Consequently, many may prefer not to receive gifts at all.
Nevertheless, there is nothing wrong with giving gifts to one another. Experts recommend paying attention to the value and manner of gift-giving, expressing your feelings modestly enough to convey your intentions.
4. Being Ostracized for Being Too Generous
Generosity can also be a form of “giving gifts” to others. However, this manner of “gift-giving” can sometimes lead to trouble for the giver.
Typically, within a group, the most disliked individuals are those who always seem to “forget” their wallets when out and about, while constantly asking to borrow money with no intention of repaying. So, based on this logic, one would assume that those who always carry their wallets and are willing to lend money would be the most liked?
However, research conducted by sociologists at Washington State University revealed a different outcome: the most generous individuals often share the same fate as the “stingy ones.”
In one experiment, volunteers were divided into groups of six, sitting in front of computers (with one member actually being a programmed computer). They were given a certain number of points, which could be converted into cash, and were asked to contribute to a common pool.
The common pool would later be doubled and equally distributed among members; in other words, if everyone contributed, all would benefit, but if someone chose not to contribute, only that individual would gain.
During the second round, volunteers were given the power to “punish” by sacrificing their own points to take away points from others. Most people punished those who were greedy and did not contribute, but strangely, those who contributed the most (mostly the programmed computer) were also punished.
Scientists explain this reaction as a result of human jealousy. We tend to feel uncomfortable and “irritated” when someone tries to “show off.” In other words, humans often have a tendency to compel others to conform to the majority, punishing those who refuse to blend in.
However, generosity remains a virtue. We cannot please everyone, so let’s just be ourselves and be “generous”… to an acceptable degree.
