When we hug, or engage in other affectionate gestures, our brains release oxytocin hormone. Oxytocin is responsible for increasing trust and social bonding between individuals. It also helps reduce stress and fear by inhibiting the activity of the amygdala. This is why a hug makes us feel safe and comfortable.
Receiving a hug from someone you like can quickly change your mood. The act of hugging helps us feel loved, at ease, and alleviates feelings of loneliness in life. However, the act of pressing bodies together and wrapping arms around each other can also make some people feel uncomfortable.
Why do we hug each other?
Before clarifying why hugging feels so good, we should start with the question of why we hug each other.
One widely accepted hypothesis is “social bonding.” The act of being close to another individual helps us establish a bond and emotional connection with that person. When humans, along with many other animal species, engage in hugging, it is considered an important behavior that fosters connections among individuals in a collective society. This bonding helps build mutual trust within the group.
Only some societies bond through affection. (Photo: kavastudio).
Humans are not the only ones who hug. Primate species, our closest relatives, also create social bonds through actions such as hugging and cuddling. Prairie voles also have ways of soothing other individuals through physical touch.
Hugging and other intimate actions allow individuals to develop trust in one another. Social bonding extends to finding a life partner. If you cannot find a mate, you will not be able to reproduce, which affects your ability to pass on your genes. And remember, all of us, to some extent, have the capacity to pass on our genes to the next generation.
Hugs can enhance the likelihood of creating the next generation, and trust between individuals within a group means you will have the support of the community when your life is threatened. This is why hugging is beneficial for evolution.
Now, let’s return to the initial question: why do hugs feel so wonderful? This is because there are several hormones affecting our bodies when we hug!
Hugging helps release love hormones in the brain
Oxytocin has quite a few nicknames, such as the cuddle hormone or love hormone. This hormone, along with neurotransmitters (chemicals that help nerve cells communicate with each other), is a small peptide consisting of 9 amino acids. It is released from a small gland in the brain called the posterior pituitary gland.
Chemical structure of oxytocin. (Photo: ytta design).
Its main functions are to support reproduction (the term oxytocin actually means “quick reproduction” in Greek) and aid in breastfeeding. However, more interestingly, oxytocin also generates a range of pleasurable feelings associated with love, such as orgasm, social bonding, familial relationships, and pairing (or finding a partner). To put it scientifically, oxytocin helps us find love, love someone, and enjoy the feeling of being loved! This is the origin of the hormone’s various nicknames.
How does oxytocin affect the brain and body?
There are numerous ways that oxytocin hormone affects our brain and body. However, since this article focuses on hugging, we will limit our discussion to related content.
Oxytocin operates through receptors. After oxytocin is released from the pituitary gland and enters the brain, it binds to oxytocin receptors. You can imagine this process as fitting two puzzle pieces together. Oxytocin will only bind to its specific type of receptor.
Oxytocin receptors are scattered throughout many regions of the brain, such as the hypothalamus, in various parts of the brain’s neural network, and even in the brainstem. When oxytocin molecules bind to receptors on nerves in these areas, they make these nerves “fire up”, signaling other parts of the brain and body to undergo changes.
However, the “hugging effect” of oxytocin does not stem from its external expressions but rather from the internal responses within the body. Oxytocin stimulates activity in certain areas of the brain, including the amygdala.
The amygdala is part of the brain’s neural network. It has many functions, but primarily it is responsible for feelings of fear, agitation, desire for praise, and sexuality.
By stimulating the amygdala, oxytocin reduces feelings of fear and stress. This reduction in anxious emotions makes us feel safer and more loved. Some experts describe this as a feeling of happiness.
A study published in 2004 in the journal Biological Psychology suggested that when we embrace, the release of oxytocin helps lower blood pressure, making us calmer. Additionally, regulating blood pressure also helps improve cardiovascular health.
Another study in 2016 found that hugging helps reduce stress and may have the potential to decrease the likelihood of infection. Stress is a state that weakens the body’s immune system, increasing the risk of illness. Social support methods, such as hugging, have been shown to help reduce stress.
Why do some people dislike hugging?
For some people, hugs are neither comfortable nor relieving.
While hugging has many health and psychological benefits, not everyone enjoys it. For some people, hugs can be uncomfortable or even distressing. After all, nothing in this world is suitable for everyone.
For those who do not like hugging, the issue might stem from childhood experiences. Children raised in families that express close physical affection often feel uncomfortable or even visibly displeased when hugging, and this mentality may persist into adulthood. Children learn social languages through their parents and families. When playing with children, parents should frequently hug and cuddle to create positive bonds within the family and help reduce children’s stress.
Culture also significantly influences this issue. In some cultures, expressing emotions through gestures is very common. In 1966, prominent psychologist Sidney Jourard counted the number of times couples touched each other during dates in San Juan (Puerto Rico), London, Paris, and Gainesville (Florida). His research article reported that “the scores were San Juan: 180, Paris: 110; London: 0; and Gainesville: 2”.
In specific situations, hugging simply may not be appropriate. We prefer to receive hugs from familiar people or friends with whom we wish to connect emotionally. Therefore, you might be very willing to accept a hug from a close friend or a long-time colleague. However, a hug from a bank clerk who just approved your loan is likely to make you feel more uncomfortable than trusting.
Simply knowing someone is not enough to “truly” hug them. It is always best to ensure mutual consent from the other party. Ask if they are willing if you want to hug them. If they agree, share a tight hug and let the emotions flow freely.