“We need to talk,” which means “I’m upset” or “there’s something going on!”
We need = I need.
I’m sorry = You will have to apologize.
That’s your decision (as long as I agree).
Go ahead, I’m not bothered = Of course, I am bothered!
You will need to learn how to communicate (so that you know to agree with me).
Do you love me? (I want an expensive gift).
How much do you love me? (Have I done something you dislike?).
“Alright”: a term used by women to end any argument where she believes she is right and wants her husband to “stop.” When a woman asks, “How do I look in this dress?” men should not respond curtly with “alright” if they do not want to start an argument that will ultimately end with her saying “Alright!”
“Five minutes” = About half an hour.
“It’s nothing” definitely means “there’s something wrong.” “It’s nothing” is often used to signal that the man should “turn off the radio!” “It’s nothing” also frequently indicates that an argument is about to start and will last for “5 minutes,” ending with…” Alright!”.
“Go ahead” (with raised eyebrows): If the man makes a mistake, the result will be a heated argument ending in “Alright!”. Typically, men will hear “Go ahead” (eyebrows raised) followed by “It’s nothing” and “Alright,” and finally have to listen to her talk for about “5 minutes” (when she has calmed down).
“Go ahead” (with normal eyebrows) means “I give up” or “do whatever you want, I don’t care.”
“Loud sigh” means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting time arguing with you about “It’s nothing.”
“Really?”: This is an interjection at the beginning of a sentence; “Really?” usually indicates that you have been caught lying. For example, “Really? I asked your brother about what you did last night,” “Really? Am I supposed to believe that?”… She will tell you “Alright” while throwing your belongings out the window, but don’t try to lie further to escape, or you’ll receive a “Go ahead” (eyebrows raised);
“That’s fine!” means she wants to think long and hard before responding to something you have caused. “That’s fine!” is often used together with “Alright” and combined with a “Go ahead” (eyebrows raised). At some point in the near future, when she has finished planning and organizing, you will definitely be in big trouble;
“Speak up”: This is an invitation for you to express yourself. She is giving you a chance to present any excuses or justifications you might have regarding anything you’ve done. If you do not speak honestly, you will receive a “That’s fine!” at the end;
“Really?”: She is not questioning the basis of what you are saying; she just wants to let you know that she doesn’t believe a word you say. You will attempt to explain and receive a “Speak up!” The more you justify, the more you will hear “Really?” with a rising tone accompanied by sarcasm, bitterness, and additional interjections of “Really?” along with raised eyebrows and finally a “loud sigh.”
“Thank you very much”: she is fed up. You have definitely hurt her. Next will be “a loud sigh!”
If women say yes means no, say love means hate, say anger means affection… then it shouldn’t be too complicated for men; they just need to understand the opposite of what women say!
The communal lifestyle of cavewomen forced women to develop indirect ways of speaking to avoid confrontation, using euphemisms to soften conflicts. However, the “Venus Dictionary” above, researched and compiled seriously by psychologists (not a satirical piece), shows that modern women have gone too far in developing a way of speaking that is not straightforward! When arguing, men around the world lament, “You’re being unreasonable!” The “Venus Dictionary” above shows that women indeed speak unreasonably! “Women say one thing but mean another” and expect men to understand; truly unreasonable! And don’t believe that men don’t really understand; it’s utterly absurd! However, men shouldn’t try to make women understand that absurdity; it’s useless! The only thing to do is to carefully examine some typical examples from the “Venus Dictionary” above to understand what women really mean. If you want your woman to be happy, men should not “correct her to speak logically,” just understand “She says go away/ Why don’t you stay?/ She tells you to stop?/ Why are you in such a hurry?/ Words are just fleeting sounds/ Her eyes are filled with tears/ Why are you so foolish/ Not looking into my eyes?”
